Oh man, Robin Williams died. Did you hear? You probably heard. It’s hard not to.
I get it, and I think he made the best decision for him. Mark Twain once said “…the suicides seem to be the only sane people.”
Louis CK can explain:
I’m not saying Robin Williams was ugly. The point I’m more interested in was the “There’s someone for everyone” bit.
“There are millions of people who are light-speed ugly, and no one kisses them on the lips even. No one touches their genitals. They just wash it and then they die. And if you’re feeling bad you can go find one, but naaaaah.”
Robin was married, so that’s not to say his sadness was brought from a lack of physical love. But for a lot of people it is. Regardless what the problem is, depression is one of those things everyone has an opinion about, except they’ve probably never been truly depressed. Sometimes smart people say smart things, but I’m a total loner on this issue, I’m sure. I think people who commit suicide are just making the best decision possible for them. Like deciding to get a tooth pulled because it’s $600 cheaper than fixing it.
I think it’s okay he died. People are upset that he’s dead not because he killed himself, but because they liked him. But not “liked him”, they “liked him.” They wanted to see the monkey dance some more. They wanted to see Mrs. Doubtfire 2. I’m guessing you probably didn’t give much thought to Robin Williams the day he died, until the news broke.
The same goes for otherwise unheard of no-name Joes that commit suicide. A few people will be unsettled by it for a few days, usually family or some such. But your boss won’t care because they’ll just replace you. Your friends will move on because they have other friends. And really, they weren’t very good friends to begin with were they? They never called, they never wanted to hang out.
So of course he committed suicide. We really have to stop being surprised that people want to die when they live in what amounts to near isolation.
Some might say they had no idea about a person being depressed, and that may be true, but I bet you know someone who struggles with it a lot. And what have you done? Hit “like” on a Facebook post?
“But what am I supposed to do?” you ask. Well, for one, you could just go be cool. Go hang out with them on Friday night. There’s not some book you have to follow. Just go chill out, even if you just sit next to each other in silence for a while.
Even being around or offering to being around people may not be enough. There are plenty of people who are depressed because they literally can not find anyone to share the kinds of experiences they desire with. Sure, we could all go play bingo at the nursing home, but eventually a person just wants to swim or bike or play a video game.
I like biking, James Bond, good sweet iced tea, video games, and swimming. I can think of about 2 people I know who also enjoy biking. I can think of 1 person I know who likes James Bond. Drinking tea seems like an odd way to spend a Friday night, but everyone else is out drinking alcohol and wondering where their headache came from anyway. And I never swim because where the heck is there a pool I can use that isn’t more expensive than my cable bill and not filled with 6 year olds? Sometimes there really are no options. This is probably why so many people spend their time drinking. And if you don’t like drinking, well, now what? Go see a show? Those cost money, and if you don’t have money, screw you, I guess, right?
You might think people who commit suicide are doing the wrong thing (as if they wanted to anyway). But what’s the difference between a person so distraught they can’t get out of bed vs. a person who has cancer and can’t get out of bed either?
For a lot of people your Mr. Obvious style statements aren’t helping, they’re just fanning a fire. So new rule: you don’t get to be shocked that the person you never loved, hung out with, helped, or even talked to much killed themselves. What would you have them do, just sit and wait until their heart gave out from being repeatedly broken?